if i ever met satan the first thing i would say is “did it hurt…when you fell from heaven??” It would be hilarious. The next thing I would do is probably burst into flame and get impaled dozens of times but it would still be hilarious
when I was shopping today with my mom, we ran into one of her ex-coworkers and he introduced himself and shook my hand and was really friendly and he and mom talked for a bit, and then after he walked away, my mom said ”He got fired because he killed three people.” and I was kinda spooked for like the next 5 minutes until I remembered my mom is a surgeon
One time I was masturbating in the shower and came so hard that I couldn’t keep in my scream but I knew my brother was in the bedroom next door and that he’d hear and know what I was doing so I quickly transitioned into singing the opening of the Lion King.